one year ago

One year ago--the last week in January-- I was team teaching through the minor prophets in a woman's Bible Study. (This is something I love to do and miss greatly. Someday the season will again come. ) We were studying the book of Jonah. You know, prophet is self absorbed and ignores the call of God on his life. Ok, we have all been there..... But, in reading it and studying to teach it, I heard things in a different light, which sometimes happens. Instead of the gospel missionary and the really hard hearted prophet there was me. Ok, I don't really think of myself as hard hearted. But, doing all of God's will for me.......well maybe I don't really listen well enough, or maybe I am afraid of it, or maybe I am just too comfortable to go out of my way to do what i know is mine to do. Well, i heard in my head a question from God; "What is it that I have asked you to do, that you are not doing?" Ok, we had just put adoption on the back burner yet once again. This time for no apparently good reason. I knew in the same instant I "heard" the question what the answer was. We began to look more seriously at the answer to that question right away. Adoption.
Can God's hand be any less evident in this adoption? (I know that his hand is evident in everyone's lives, no matter the circumstances or time lines, and it is just amazing to trace it!)

Both boys came to the same orphanage THE SAME WEEK I "heard" God's question for us.
They were "temporarily" referred to two different families to hold them for us while we got our paperwork in order.
We knew we wanted two boys, God led us to the country and agency.
The were released for referral the same week we were ready for referrals.
God impressed on my heart which of the boys available were the ones for our family before we even knew about the paperwork dilemmas which would later come up.
(there were three, one did not have his papers ready in time and God was
already working to place him with the family he belongs in, and he is home with
them now!!!)
They passed court together the first time through, and before the long court closure.
We traveled to get them and brought them home exactly 5 months to the day of signing up with our agency.
Laws changed and waiting lists got longer, waits got longer just after we brought the boys home.

I know that even when things are tough God is still working, he never leaves us and we are never out of his plan for our lives. It is great to look back and trace his fingerprints on events and particularly fun when they are so easy to trace.

We have had the boys 6 months this Friday. And, I read all about what to expect. I think the boys may have read it too because they do it like clockwork. :) Right now they are "testing" to see if this is permanent, if we are going to send them away and if we mean what we say about loving them with love and boundaries, etc...... Figuring it all out still. This means lots of patience for Mommy! Ha! Not without the strength of the Holy Spirit in my life. I am a naturally IMpatient person. But, in Ephesians, which i am reading right now, it says that the power of God dwells in those who are Christians. This same power that created the earth and commands the wind and waves, who raised Christ from the dead and superintends over every aspect of our lives. Ok, that is BIG! And BIG is just what I need.

In church we are going through how we are to be about worship with all of our lives, it is not a Sunday morning phenomenon. I have been saying this for a long time... but it is good to delve into what that means. You may know the catechism question. What is the chief end of man? A: "To glorify God and enjoy him forever"..... what does that mean anyway? Well, that is what we are investigating in these sermons. You may also know the verse Mark 12:30
Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.' Well, I got the mind part as I am a theology driven person. (for example, tracing the hand of God in our adoption story) Heart and soul, well there is something I have heard about and striven for and so often felt, but where to put that I have been wondering about (for example, being awed by God's work in our adoption story). Strength; we just learned that this is a physical response, something that I have NEVER thought of before. Somehow I just skipped it. Ok, theology is number one here in my life and mind, then how to move the 'I know it" to the heart and soul "I feel it", well that was where i stopped. But, when the Holy Spirit indwells you, he illuminates life and the Bible so you understand it (mind), then you feel something about what you understand and that heart and soul needs to be expressed and that is where strength comes in, the physical response to all God has done in and for us. Thinking about this I can see that when my attitude is glorifying to God when I cook and clean and love my family and my world then that is one form of action/strength, but what else, I KNOW there is more, I am yearning for it, but what is it? Ok, the pastor has not even gotten to this one yet, so i am eager to hear what he has learned and will teach us, and to study it myself too. Anyway, this co-insided with my study of Ephesians and the power of God living in us. Which is co-insiding with my need for God's strength to keep up with these boys (and the rest of my little family too!) and attachement and transition, etc.... WOW! What a journey.